Greetings Eddies!
One of Val Morse's daughters read before kindergarten. The other sat at the table in tears saying she hated books.
Before we get to what Val did about it, a proper hello for our new readers. Since I keep asking families to let me into their kitchens, living rooms, and commutes, it seemed fair for you to know whose voice this is.
I'm Ela 👋
If you listen to the podcast, you've heard me open with "I'm your sometimes host." After 50+ of these conversations, I'm dropping the "sometimes." I'm your host.
I went to traditional school the whole way through. My cousins were homeschooled, so I knew other ways existed, but I never thought a different way could be for me. Then my little brother went to a school that let him customize his classes, and I watched him explore who he was and come to terms with who he wanted to be. He found engineering that way. More than that, he came out able to make hard decisions with confidence. Watching him, I started counting the things I didn't learn about myself until I was an adult.
What I believe now is simple: Every child is unique and needs something different to develop their gifts and interests.
That is what I hear in every one of these conversations, and none of the families sound alike - different rhythms, different values. Then you meet the kids and are amazed at what came out of them because someone was paying attention.
I'm also starting to document my own learning in public at @ela.learns. And I want the next season of guests to come from you: reply to this email with what you want the podcast to dig into - a method, a fear, a family that looks like yours, or a specific guest you want to hear.
Which takes us back to this week's guest.
“The kids I know don’t know how to be bored”
Since our interview, I’ve been thinking about something Val said:
I knew exactly what she meant. I was a curious kid - but there were stretches where I got used to being entertained and forgot what genuine interest felt like. The difference is real. One follows you. The other disappears when the screen or input does.
The kids I know now don’t really know how to be bored. They don’t sit in quiet. There’s always noise coming in. And I wonder sometimes what that costs them - because figuring out who you are requires space. It requires reaching for something when nothing is handed to you.
What do you think? Is this something you notice in the kids around you?
What to do when your kid hates reading
In this episode:
Why the younger daughter resisted books when her sister read early, and why it was never really about reading
Who Val handed the reading instruction to (and why it wasn't her)
What she means by "being interested in life is a skill," and how that differs from being entertained
How to make peace with the fact that you have a lot less control than you might think
“You have about 30% of the control you think you have.”
You can connect with Val on her personal Instagram, or her “Bookstagram” @fellowshipoftheread
- Ela
P.S. If you have been meaning to tell me what you want more of on the podcast, this is the email to reply to. I read every one.
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